I heard this was the toughest match. You don’t have the feeling like it’s your last match but yet you know what you have in store.
I was definitely depleted from the bike trip and it was my last week of camp. My energy dollars were spent. I was lucky that I had an extra day as my treatment wasn’t until Tuesday. Bonus Monday! Bonus Bike rides! Bonus feeling good at camp! 😍
On Tuesday morning I got in a bike ride with Rugged and raced back to the Academy to get picked up by my momma. I was sweaty and dirty and smiling ~ and running late 🤣. Luckily lala is a lead foot and we screeched into the UVMMC just 5 min late.
Getting my IV in is the roughest part of the whole process. It usually around 5 attempts per treatment. We called in a specialist from the lab department and in solid fashion she had a team of students studying with her and after a few misses earlier Diana got it in first attempt! Yahoo! Thank you for sparing me that extra pain. Each time we entertained getting a port but with the infrequent dose dense treatment I would do anything to avoid that even if it meant hours of vein finding.
It was a hot week in the 90’s and humid not the most ideal for being outside all day with 40 kids and feeling the chemo way but it was the last week and there was no way I was going to miss a minute. I charged through, the kids helped me heal and it was great. Every afternoon me and my mom would get to the river in the XC center and do the game changer dunk. Exhilarating. On Friday I was a mess. I had so much emotion running through me. The last day of camp usually hits me in the heart center pretty intensely as you are holding energetic, physical and mental space for so many children and counselors all summer long. Its a serious responsibility and one that I take very seriously and personally each season that I’m working with these kids. This year was even more intense ~ obviously! I was so so worried about what the summer was going to look like and my level of attendance- but I did it!!! Way more than I imagined! I didn’t miss a day! That feeling of accomplishment and it being our biggest summer ever was bringing me to tears on a dime. I was so thankful to all the other big kids that stepped up and did an amazing job with the kids and of course the one and only TM who is the best business partner and friend I could ask for. I spent the whole day going from smiles to alligator tear drops- it was all hitting me at once. I also had this feeling of sadness as to how I was going to get through round 4 without all the support from these amazing kids. They brought me so many smiles and heartwarming moments. They were a huge part of my healing team. I was also treated with a cooler of delicious ice cream and popsicle treats when I got home on Friday from Kristi & Christine. That was a day I usually treated myself to a few spicey seltzer’s but a mango popsicle did the trick 🙏🏻. Thank you 🙏🏻
Each end of season summer & winter I go through a transition period. When I work in season it’s 110% full throttle on the gas peddle. Raising kids, being a wife, trying to have self care and working 110% is a lot! I love my work but I have also grown to appreciate and understand how important my recharge moments are in between. It’s about a week long period that I feel the space open up and it actually is uncomfortable for a little bit. Than I quickly realize the joy in more presence with my kids and how much I love being alone in the woods biking & walking - focusing on my spiritual being in quiet and having more space to meet up with friends and have meaningful beautiful conversations. I still have work to do but it’s way more flexible and for that I’m grateful. Balance, wholeness, harmony. Saturday after treatment my lifelong friend Gretchen showed up for a visit and it was another beautiful connecting day together. The bright light on a dim day. We talked, we are nachos and went for a small walk.
The next week I went up and had lunch with my girl Christine at healthy living - always the best conversations my soul sister 🙏🏻. I was feeling better and the week just took off from there. I was not bouncing back as quickly as the first 2 rounds but I was feeling better everyday.
The most exciting news ever was that two of my dear friends had a baby!! Katie & Zach had a healthy baby boy - Charlie Sullivan Sigler! The highlight of highlights. I got to spend time with Oskar their doggie and my heart was bursting with love and fullness for them and that I get to spend the rest of my life loving this new human. Pure joy.
I spent week 3 visiting Charlie and testing out new bikes- big, big highlight 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️. Heart full. ❤️ Fueling up for my last round.
